Yes, I am a new mom. And no, I do not have all of the answers. Babies do not come with a manual, therefore everything is trial and error. And you can only hope that each time there is a lesson learned and that something can be taken from each incident to prevent it from happening again.
It was a regular weekday night and Brooke was at my parents all day. We joined my parents for dinner after work. Brooke typically eats her dinner at 5, while we eat later than that. So we all sat down for our meal and Brooke was given some Gerber puffs to snack on. She has mastered the pincer grasp so she is very fast at eating bite sized pieces now. After we were all done, we headed home (Michael was going by Walgreens in his truck to pick up some pictures I had printed). I got Brooke out of her car seat and we playfully ran to her room. I sat her on the ground to crawl around while I finished putting her laundry away, waiting for Daddy to get home and start her bath. As she crawled towards her toys, she started making a weird noise and slowly turned back towards mommy. She had what looked like vomit coming out of her nose. She started crying, which made her inhale the spit up, which led to coughing and gasping. She was turning red and crying more than I have ever seen her. I didn't know whether she needed the Heimlich or not! In that moment, I was a scared mother, not knowing what to do for her child who needed her.
Of course, I scooped her up right away and cleared her nose and pat her back. She was crying and coughing, which meant she was breathing. However, I was unsure if anything got into her lungs. I have recently heard so much of Secondary Drownings, and was not sure if something in her lungs could cause asphyxiation later. Michael was not home yet and I was trembling, I panickly called 911. Not sure exactly what I was hoping they would do, but they surely offered me no help. "Ma'am, if you do not need an ambulance or fire-truck, I can't do anything for you." Based on what I have seen in movies, I guess I was thinking they would calm me down and provide some sort of guidance... Not quite.
Within minutes, Michael, both my parents and I were surround little Brooke still unsure what was going on. My guess is that she had too much too eat and I possibly jumbled that around when we got home. As she was crawling, the vomit came out of her nose rather than her mouth and it scared her more than anything! The taste and smell in her nose, plus the scare of choking up spit up was fearful for her. We got in touch with the nurse at the pediatrician's office and spoke with her and the doctor on-call. They were encouraging us to visit a 24-hour urgent care, and while waiting for our appointment (yes, this 24-hour urgent care facility requires appointments!) Brooke fell asleep. Close to 9 pm, 2 hours after her normal bedtime, and no bottle, Brooke was passed out. I was nervous to let her sleep, because I wasn't sure if she needed medical attention, but I know she was worn out. After a lot of discussion, Michael and I decided to monitor her through the night and reevaluate in the morning. We watched the baby monitor and physically checked on her about every 5 minutes for the first hour. It was at least another hour or more that I was able to finally lay down and close my eyes. Grammy agreed to watch her on the internet monitor until 1, because she was just as nervous as I was.
We spoke with the doctor's office first thing in the morning, after Brooke woke up more chipper than usual. They said it sounded like we did the right thing and thought that based on her lack of symptoms, it was not necessary to bring her in. We monitored her closely the following day and saw nothing unusual from her typical behavior. We were so fortunate!
It is is too often lately that I hear about coworkers or friends having infant relatives pass away in their sleep, or the stories you hear on the news of babies that were accidentally left in the vehicle. It breaks my heart. I can't even fathom that loss. Yet, I do not think that the parents of these children are bad parents. They are human. Had something happened to Brooke the other night, I do not know what I would have done. I was right there with her the entire night, from the time she put the first puff in her mouth to the time she was gasping for air. And thank the heavens, we were fortunate that it was not more serious. However, often parents are not. I thank God every day for our little bundle of joy and I am grateful for every moment that we have together. You are never guaranteed tomorrow and therefore today is merely a present.
Lessons learned. You can never be too careful with little ones. We are going to make sure Brooke does not have too much to snack on and more so, that she is not too active after eating. There is no telling exactly what it was that caused this - was it the amount of puffs, or too much water, were we too rough too soon after eating... We won't know for sure. We can just assume it was one of those and be extra cautious from here on out.
Is this the only time I am going to freak out and call 911? I'm not sure. Is this the first time, we will make an appointment at a 24-hour Urgent Care for our daughter? Probably not. As a parent, the life of another human being is in your hands and you will do everything in your power to prevent something from disrupting their perfect and precious world. Sometimes, however, there are instances that you cannot see coming. You can only hope and pray that they are not severe and that the previous situation has made you a stronger and more experienced parent to tackle the next thing coming.
My prayers today are for all of my fellow parents who are just trying to figure it out.
